Print this and keep it in your bag on tournament day. Your job is to support — not coach.

Where Parents Should Be

• During rounds: Outside the playing hall. Do not stand in the doorway.
• Between rounds: Available but not hovering. Give your child space to decompress.
• At the pairings board: Let your child find their own pairing if they’re old enough.
• During awards: In the audience — not coaching from the sidelines.

If you are not sure where parents are allowed, ask the tournament director at registration.

Before the Round — Your Job

• Make sure your child has water and a snack available for the break
• Make sure they’ve used the restroom before the round
• Send them to their board calmly — no last-minute coaching
• Say something simple: “Play your best. Have fun.”
• Go to the parent waiting area

During the Round — Your Job

• Wait patiently
• Do not walk past the boards and look at the game
• Do not signal, gesture, or make eye contact through windows or doors
• Do not speak to other parents about your child’s position
• Keep your phone silent

After a Win

• Acknowledge it: “Great game — how did it go?”
• Let them tell the story rather than reconstructing it yourself
• Don’t turn it into a coaching session
• Keep the energy calm — big wins lead to overconfidence

After a Loss

The rule: After a loss, ask one open question, then follow their lead. If they want to talk chess, talk chess. If they don’t, drop it.

Food and Hydration — Your Responsibility

Children do not manage this well themselves at tournaments. You manage it.

• Offer water at every break — thirst affects concentration
• Pack a real snack: protein + carbs (cheese + crackers, peanut butter, trail mix)
• Avoid heavy meals between rounds — they slow thinking
• Avoid sugar spikes before a game

How to Stay Calm Yourself

• Remember: the goal at early tournaments is experience, not trophies
• A loss in round 3 is not a reflection of your parenting
• Other children’s results are not your business
• The TD is handling disputes — you don’t need to intervene
• Your child is watching how you react to wins and losses

When to Contact the Tournament Director

• If your child is injured or becomes ill
• If your child has a scheduling conflict with a round (tell them before the round, not during)
• If you see a rule violation involving your child — but do not intervene yourself

From Chess Tournament Guide — ChessTournamentGuide.com